Captains Inspection

[Rod]

Whether of not the sacked person was flown home usually depended on the severity of the crime and the compassion of the Staff Captain as between flights home were paid for by the miscreant, and if they flew home on a crew flight they were not charged.
Once on a world cruise I had an assistant mechanic that I had to "log" time and time again! No I was not a martinet, I was not the best behaved Officer on the QE 2. After the 5th or 6th logging I believe it was the Staff Captain decided he deserved he be sacked.. His logging took place during his watch. He got sacked, Staff Captain said he would fly home on the next leave flight, he was returned to duty, otherwise he would lose money. So he came down to the boiler room with 2 hours to go on the watch. 8-12.
After about 15 minutes he started screaming at me and threatining me that he was going to do bodily harm to me. This was at the boiler room console. The tannoy microphone was on the console shelf so i just held the talk button down so the MCR could hear it.  After about 4 minutes, the MCR sent someone down to investigate...they were having a cup of tea!  They called the Masters at Arms to remove this guy and I finished the shift on my own. Evening shift 8pm they put a new guy on with me....John remember him well..got to know him well...just released from prison after spending 18 years for murder.
The threatener was logged and sacked again! The Chief Engineer was a witness on the bridge and asked that the man be flown home immediately. Staff Captain denied. This guy was put back on duty.  For those of you that know the boiler room...there are many areas that can be accessed from above.

[Rod]

So I had to stay under a catwalk where thing couldnt be dropped on me.
I had an escort from watch to the cabin to the wardroom back to my cabin.
Then I found the solution....Jack Humphries the Donkeyman!...Told him what was going on and he took care of it.

[carljhson63]

Oh yeah captains inspections were pretty random, i can recall once before a refit We went topside to see what we could salvage before they started to refurnish the cabins.all passengers were gone and the carpenters, fitters were all doing their jobs,we kind of found a few good items. A TV video recorder ,fridge, curtains , lamps spot lights a bar and then re decorated our cabin. it was really nice home from home. even got a wooden plaque on our door "club 458'.and on our first voyage guess what, we heard a shout captains inspection. Well you can imagine that we kinda scurried around to hide everything. We did a pretty good job. Captain came along saw our cabin was clean and tidy then they left. We were relieved and got everything back out and back to normal put on a video sat down relaxed and began to watch death wish. Just then capatain came back to our cabin and said that he forgot to mention.......... then realized is this the same cabin we were in 10 minutes ago. took a look around smiled then said "well lads i will be back next week and i expect all these items to be returned to where they came from "... guess we were lucky but all the stuff was being replaced anyway.So we stripped our cabin bare and took it to storage.The chief steward at the time was a great bloke i cant remember his name big guy thick glasses, he did let us keep the tv and fridge though hahaha.

[Peter Mugridge]

There is a strong irony in the title of the film you were watching, is there not?!